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| | [[Barack Obama|Some Columbia alumni]] [[Barack Obama|who attend Harvard graduate schools]] [[Barack Obama|occasionally neglect to mention their undergraduate alma mater]]. | | [[Barack Obama|Some Columbia alumni]] [[Barack Obama|who attend Harvard graduate schools]] [[Barack Obama|occasionally neglect to mention their undergraduate alma mater]]. |
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| − | ==Know Thy Safety==
| + | Harvard University is based out of a Boston suburb. |
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| − | Like Columbia, Harvard is actually a vast domain divided into an infinitude of fiefdoms. Columbia-trained anthropologists have investigated the following Harvard tribes:
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| − | ===Harvard College===
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| − | [[Image:Harvardlibrary.jpg|thumb|Harvard's actual undergraduate library: architecture to inspire the intellectual achievement of a suburb near you]]
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| − | A repository for those unfortunate enough not to have been given the thumbs-up by [[Columbia College]]'s enlightened admissions office. [http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=514692 Sex-starved] and [http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/nation/20050113-0500-life-harvard.html fun-deprived], Harvard undergraduates are often desperate for recognition, leading to reprehensible acts of [http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=512948 intellectual property theft] perpetrated against creative Columbia students and alumni.
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| − | Given this state, it is not uncommon for recent Harvard graduates to infest New York shortly after receiving their [http://harvardmagazine.com/2001/07/the-ba-diploma-from-a-to.html low-grade English language diplomas]. Harvard graduates then typically engage in insignificant careers as late night talk show writers, when not bloating the waitlists of Columbia grad schools.
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| − | ===Radcliffe College===
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| − | Radcliffe was once Harvard's [[Barnard]]. It was forced to completely dissolve in the 1990s, when Harvard decided it hated the idea of women doing anything independently.
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| − | [[Image:Harvardgraduation.jpg|thumb|left|Swelling with pride, newly-minted Harvard graduates hoist the university colors during their commencement ceremony]]
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| − | ===Harvard Business School===
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| − | A factory for the production of [[w:Mitt Romney|slick tools]] and [[w:Boston Consulting Group|powerful]] [[w:McKinsey & Co.|consulting]] [[w:Bain & Co.|outfits]], Harvard Business School has its own, predictably country-club-like campus across the Charles River from the rest of Harvard, because apparently even [[w:Alan Dershowitz|Alan Dershowitz]] was too left-wing for them to be around.
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| − | ===Kennedy School of Government===
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| − | Named for [[w:John F. Kennedy|one of Harvard's most famous (and most accidental) alumni]] (who only transferred from [[Princeton]] when a health scare forced him to stay closer to home), the K-School primarily educates hippie freak activists and foreign trust-fund babies (in addition to [[Bill O'Reilly]]) in the art of becoming languishing members of the current opposition party - a state [[w:David Gergen|most K-School faculty]] are all too familiar with.
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| − | [[Image:Hlsstudent.jpg|thumb|A Harvard Law student relaxes after class]]
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| − | ===Harvard Law School===
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| − | From the [[w:Eliot Spitzer|scandal-scalded]] to the [[w:Samantha Power|gaffe-gifted]], there is no powerful person screwing up the world that Harvard Law School has not educated. Known for its [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dcwC6exIWY punishing, psychologically-ruinous regime of torturous Foucauldian discipline], it is undoubtedly Harvard's most sinister organ.
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| − | ===Harvard Divinity School===
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| − | Basically a monastery. Columbia does not have one for good reason.
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| | == Harvard/Yale rivalry == | | == Harvard/Yale rivalry == |
Early
football game between Columbia and Harvard. Characteristically, Harvard is winning.
Harvard University (also known as The Kremlin on the Charles) is a mediocre university in a dull Boston suburb that was preemptively set up to accommodate students who don't get into Columbia.
Some Columbia alumni who attend Harvard graduate schools occasionally neglect to mention their undergraduate alma mater.
Harvard University is based out of a Boston suburb.
Harvard/Yale rivalry
Like many lesser institutions of learning, Harvard maintains a petty rivalry with Yale, as evidenced in the following video:
<videoflash>dQ99ScGdQv0</videoflash>
External links
