Difference between revisions of "Washington, DC"
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[[Image:07WashingtonDC.jpg|right|thumb|Familiar, right?]] | [[Image:07WashingtonDC.jpg|right|thumb|Familiar, right?]] | ||
| − | '''Washington, DC''' is the ''de jure'' capital of the United States. This sad state of affairs came about when some why Southerners staged a fit, causing the seat of government being relocated from congenial [[New York City]] to a filthy swamp on the Virginia-Maryland border. This sweaty, rotting stew has served as the physical (and, apparently, moral) foundation for the US government ever since. | + | '''Washington, DC''' is the ''de jure'' capital of the United States, home to the [[President of the United States]] and institutions like [[Congress]]. This sad state of affairs came about when some why Southerners staged a fit, causing the seat of government being relocated from congenial [[New York City]] to a filthy swamp on the Virginia-Maryland border. This sweaty, rotting stew has served as the physical (and, apparently, moral) foundation for the US government ever since. |
| − | Washington is not so much a city as a collection of pompous monuments surrounded by blocks of bland, [[IAB]]-like office parks, which | + | Washington is not so much a city as a collection of pompous monuments surrounded by blocks of bland, [[IAB]]-like office parks, which were long, in turn, surrounded by crack dens. If the layout of its vaunted "Mall" looks familiar, it's because Charles McKim of Columbia campus designers [[McKim, Mead, and White]] was on its planning committee. |
It does not lie in a state, but rather a federal territory with the gumption to call itself the '''District of Columbia'''. It is forgiven for doing so only because it was given its name during the same orgiastic renaming phenomenon that bestowed [[Columbia College]] its own moniker - and because the name "District of [[Yale]]" would have sucked far more. | It does not lie in a state, but rather a federal territory with the gumption to call itself the '''District of Columbia'''. It is forgiven for doing so only because it was given its name during the same orgiastic renaming phenomenon that bestowed [[Columbia College]] its own moniker - and because the name "District of [[Yale]]" would have sucked far more. | ||
| − | DC, as the locals call it, | + | DC, as the locals call it, made some marginal improvements as a city after [[Barack Obama|a Columbia graduate]] began to reign over things. |
[[Category:United States]] | [[Category:United States]] | ||
[[Category:Cities]] | [[Category:Cities]] | ||
Latest revision as of 14:50, 6 May 2024
Washington, DC is the de jure capital of the United States, home to the President of the United States and institutions like Congress. This sad state of affairs came about when some why Southerners staged a fit, causing the seat of government being relocated from congenial New York City to a filthy swamp on the Virginia-Maryland border. This sweaty, rotting stew has served as the physical (and, apparently, moral) foundation for the US government ever since.
Washington is not so much a city as a collection of pompous monuments surrounded by blocks of bland, IAB-like office parks, which were long, in turn, surrounded by crack dens. If the layout of its vaunted "Mall" looks familiar, it's because Charles McKim of Columbia campus designers McKim, Mead, and White was on its planning committee.
It does not lie in a state, but rather a federal territory with the gumption to call itself the District of Columbia. It is forgiven for doing so only because it was given its name during the same orgiastic renaming phenomenon that bestowed Columbia College its own moniker - and because the name "District of Yale" would have sucked far more.
DC, as the locals call it, made some marginal improvements as a city after a Columbia graduate began to reign over things.
