Cornell University

Cornell students visit Ithaca's beautiful gorges to engage in their school's most popular pastime: drowning

Cornell University (as it is called by students and alumni), or SUNY Ithaca (as it is called by everybody else) is New York State's other Ivy League school. Located in some far-off upstate wilderness, it's known for being filled with Columbia rejects, having a SUNY agriculture school, and a hotel management academy. In addition, it was recently discovered that they have an "Interior Design" major. And it's not even in the Hotel School.

Cornell students are often noted for their insistence on reminding everyone that they went to an Ivy League school. For example, when alumni from each of the eight Ivy League schools were asked where they attended college, they responded:

Harvard Grad: I attended Harvard University.

Yale Grad: I went to Yale.

Princeton Grad: I went to Princeton.

Columbia Grad: I went to Columbia.

Dartmouth Grad: I went to Dartmouth.

Brown Grad: I went to Brown.

Penn Grad: I went to Penn...the Ivy League, not the state school.

Cornell Grad: I have an Ivy League education.

Cornell students also tend to don "Ithaca Is Gorges" shirts. These reflect pride in the university's dramatic rate of picturesque suicides, in which it rivals NYU.

Observing Cornell fans at Columbia sporting events (disgusting gloating when they win, vociferous bitching when they lose) will reveal that they possess the greatest inferiority complex to Columbia out of all the Ivies.