Fordham University

Fordham University is the Jesuit university for New York City. Has their main campus in The Bronx and another near Lincoln Center. Generally, the former is filled with conservative jocks and the latter with performing arts major hipsters who seem like they ought to be going to NYU or neighboring Julliard.

Fordham plays Columbia in a football game known as the Liberty Cup. Fordham have won the last two Liberty Cups to lead 4-3 in number of victories, and hence have claimed bragging rights over Columbia. Fortunately, unlike Fordham students Columbia students are not fanatically obsessed with superfluous things like football, and since we overshadow them in every other category, we'll let them have it. I hasten to add, however, that Columbia leads Fordham 8-6 in all football games played since 1991, but by 11-6 if you care to count victories in 1972 (just after Fordham brought football back), 1902 and 1890.

If ever you feel insecure because you didn't get into Harvard or Yale, a snide quip about Fordham will instantly relieve you of any doubts that it is worth the $50,000 you are paying in tuition at Columbia.

To Fordham's credit, it did graduate the the illustrious Vin Scully. This achievement is sullied, however, by subsequent epic sportscasting failures.